Saturday, December 27, 2008

Passages


Most of the events of great importance in my life have happened in late December. I mean major, major events. I won't go into any right now except for two of them, ok three of them.

It is one year ago today that I dislocated my shoulder. That led to two surprise surgeries in the following months, one to put a pin in my upper arm and one to remove a kidney. I'd never had surgery before. To say that the events of that morning a year ago have had lasting effects would be an understatement. I feared in the worst way that I had kidney cancer from my years of smoking. It is not a cancer with very positive outcomes so to have be spared this diagnosis has been a wonderful gift for which I give thanks each day.

Five years ago yesterday I became a grandmother for the first time. I did say major events didn't I? Last night I was talking to my grandson about the events of his big day. We talked about being at his other grandma's, playing with his cousins, Santa coming into his room on Christmas Eve, his gifts, and lots of other things when suddenly he said, "Aren't you going to sing Happy Birthday to me, Grandma?" Now someone who would actually ask me to sing has to be a great addition to your life.

It is twenty-five years ago tomorrow that my brother died of Graft Versus Host Disease following a bone marrow transplant. He died at 27 so would be 52 now. His wife passed away very suddenly just over a year ago. Last week I sent his kids a great photo of their parents when they were dating and so happy in love. His kids were one and three years old at the time and my daughter was three weeks. That all this time has passed and those children are all grown up brings the most profound lessons of all. I ponder all of these events and all the others of late December and early January and give them the respect that they deserve.

A fitting song for today might be How Will You Meet Your End by AA Bondy. It dares ask that question we all wonder about and will all realize at some time.

The rest of the songs today are for my brother. They're from our childhood. We made up a game when we were kids and this song (by the Patsy Cline version) was a part of the game. A newer version that I think my brother would like is I Fall To Pieces with Aaron Neville and Trisha Yearwood. Another old one is The Battle of New Orleans with Johnny Horton. With that song, I'll stick to the version 1959 we knew best.

6 comments:

Ocean said...

I like your blog post a lot today! I didn't know it was 25 years tomorrow for D. Did you talk to E the other day?

Cuidado said...

Yes, I sent her the photos.

Kat said...

Cuidado,
I am so glad that you can remember the joys of late December as well as the pain.

I hope the next year brings you so many moments of joy that you lose count!

Cuidado said...

I would like that too, Kat and hope because you hoped it, it will come true.

Carol Tiffin James said...

It's interesting that the good and the bad both play out at the same time this month for you. I remember when my beloved grandfather died in January 1983. My cousin (his grandson) was expecting his first child that very day, his wife was in labor, and they were in phone contact, encouraging Paw-Paw to "hold on because you've got a new great grandbaby on the way today!" One going out, one coming in. The cycle of life.

I hope you have a blessed new year.

Cuidado said...

Yesterday my very elderly grandmother passed away. One day after the 25th aniv. of my brother. Early in Dec is ok for me. I have two kids born on the same day but the end of the month is death and destruction in my life. It's very weird.