Saturday, May 08, 2010
Hey, Mom, Here's Some Flowers
This photo is to show a mishap that I had today. I took 85 shots in my garden and it turned out I had my camera set from last night when I was taking photos of a sunset. The shots of the garden are very dark and unsalvageable if you don't have the software or skills for post processing. I don't. I will try to add some light from Picasa but they are probably toast. That's okay but the light is not at all nice outside now, two hours later.
I am feeling very tired. It's my day off and I have a case of low energy which is not like me. I've done a ton of chores, have a great supper in the works and am writing in a blog but without the pep I am usually blessed (or cursed) with.
I made a plan to sleep in today because I was tired after a hectic week. I woke up bright eyed and bushy tailed at 6:03 and reminded myself that I had decided to sleep in so slept for another hour. I woke up groggy. I think if I had gotten up at 6:03 I would be fine now. I have learned this lesson before but tend to learn the hard way.
Mother's Day is weighing heavily on me. It has been twelve years since I lost my mom and Mother's Day has been the hardest day of the year ever since. Her birthday is soon as well, so I always have kind of sad thoughts of her in May. It is getting easier though as I worked hard to stop making it a terrible day for my kids. They used to sit helplessly by as I cried inconsolably all day. I'm past that thankfully, but my heart is still heavy.
This mood is bringing the music today as I think of my mother who is gone too soon. She died at aged sixty from early-onset Alzheimer's disease. This is the music of my mood. Beth Nielsen Chapman covers the old, Sometimes I Feel Like A Motherless Child and Gillian Welsh's song, Orphan Girl, by Crooked Still. Tomorrow I will celebrate her instead of thinking of the unfairness of this terrible disease. I think I will make her a card.